As we did our Values Exercise in this week’s session, one dear woman expressed that she’d been contemplating getting either an Executive MBA– OR a Master Gardener certification.

Successful in her career and now in her early fifties, earlier she had expressed that she wanted to be happy, with more time for herself.

Along the way she’s also raised four children; she enjoys a loving marriage and wants to travel.

When she spoke about the MBA, she sounded anxious, stressed and uncertain. When she spoke about the Master Gardener certification, she sounded relaxed, peaceful and filled with joy.

I asked her whose voice was challenging her to get an MBA at this stage of her career. I also asked whether she wanted to be a hard-charging businesswoman for the next 10-15 years, which would be a main motivator for getting an MBA.

Just asking herself these questions gave her the answer  she sought, to align her actions with her values & vision.

She said that at the next morning’s MBA breakfast she would tell them she had decided to take a different direction.

Next time you’re on the verge of a major decision ask yourself:  Who will really be satisfied with the direction you’re taking?

Does it align with the vision that makes your heart sing?

P.S.– I know that a lot of people’s hearts sing by writing– and a lot of people are attracted to me by my inspirational
book. They’re thinking, “If she can do that, I can do that.”

And they’re right!

My writing mentor Tom Bird is bringing his “Write Your Publishable Book in a Weekend Workshop” to Atlanta October 6-8– Early Bird Special of $700 off is happening until Memorial Day. As his sponsor, I urge you to check it out if you feel you have a book in you!  

Tom Bird Write Your Publishable Book in a Weekend

I originally saw this message, which I have edited extensively, on my dear friend Jean Adrienne’s Ezine

I think it’s so important during this time of intensive energy and releasing the negative that I’m excerpting it here for you.

“We wish to speak to you of miracles. You are capable of producing miracles in every moment now–IF you believe that this is true. It’s that simple.

The difficulty you face is the simplicity of the plan. For too many lifetimes you have bought into a belief in struggle…

You have yet to fully integrate this information, else you would all be healthy, wealthy, successful, beautiful and more….

So–back to basics. Everything is energy…The reason you incarnate on Planet Earth is to remember that and to learn how to manage what you are. In plainer words–to learn how to manipulate energy in order to create matter.

Divine Thought. When you can remember that one concept, you will hold the ultimate key to manifestation. All the power of the Universe is contained within your heart and your mind–or more precisely within the mind of your heart.

Therefore, with your thoughts, you can do anything, create anything, and transform anything. Why? Because it is all part of your dream creation.

The energy frequency of creation is love, so according to the natural law of attraction, in order to attune yourself with your creative power, you must align with the frequency of love. You must love yourself at every level and in every way. This has been the hurdle for many of you because your dogmas have taught you that this was inappropriate–that focusing your attention on loving yourself was wrong, selfish. You have been taught that you were supposed to love others first–to place them in a greater place of importance than you hold yourself.

Well, guess what that did for you? … you gave away your power to create.

Everything you desire to change in your reality is possible through the energy of love, so hear this clearly. Rather than disliking the things you don’t want to see anymore–your irritating boss, your debt, your flabby thighs or any aspect of your body you deem to be in ill health–you must first love them.

Fall deeply in love with them. Expand your heart center and allow it to communicate your love to your body, your bills and your boss.

Love them totally and then decide what you would like to create. Would that be a completely new job, enough money to erase your debts, a younger or healthier body? Decide–commit fully to your decision and then love it.

In the past… you decided what you wanted but your commitment wasn’t there because you didn’t really believe it was possible for you to have it. And why didn’t you believe you could have it?

Because you didn’t love yourself enough to blow through your old beliefs around deserving…. If you question whether or not something is going to happen for you, you can know for sure you have fallen away from your commitment.

Join with us now. Take this time to reclaim your power to create the most expansive, glorious, magnificent expression of YOU possible. Claim it now! Allow your energy to be brought back into balance with the frequency of Divine Love and start creating. Believe it and it becomes your new reality. You can. You can because we love you enough that you can see your truth.”

If you missed me, in April I dropped off the edge of cyberworld, except for an exciting announcement (which I’ll share again below).

I’m glad to be ascending from that dark place once again.

I was deep into grappling with some MAJOR shadow issues which surfaced while researching past journals to add “eek”-ish, scintillating details (including raw, painful times that I’d repressed & stuffed down) to my current book-in-progress.

As the style editor said about my draft, it’s a page-turner, and people love stories about beautiful young people, sex, wealth and the South. And rolling in the mud.

But in my own healing process, do I have the guts to share these tales in hopes they’ll help others heal as well? (It does help that my parents are no longer around to read them. Mercy!)

As we release our limiting old stories of victimhood we help to shift global consciousness.

As we heal ourselves, our energetic presence and possibilities help heal others.

As we lighten up, we light up the world.

Enjoy my Feature on grappling with the shadow.

P.S.– I’m sponsoring my writing mentor Tom Bird’s “Write Your Publishable Book in a Weekend Workshop” October 6-8 in Atlanta– Early Bird Special of $700 off is happening until Memorial Day!

Tom Bird Write Your Publishable Book in a Weekend

The response to our pre-registration for Tom Bird’s Write Your Publishable Book in a Weekend Retreat over Columbus Day Weekend (October 6-8, 2012) has been GREAT!

To take advantage of the early sign-up ($700 discount off the regular $1495 investment in the retreat), simply enter the discount code of 0795 when you register and check out at Tom’s site:   Tom Bird

I’ve believed in Tom’s amazing, heart-centered writing method since my first book BACK TO THE GARDEN: Getting from Shadow to Joy won five inspirational awards after being mentored by him. Since then I’ve sold thousands of copies of that book for thousands of dollars.

Need a payment plan, no problem. Just give Tom’s office a call at 928-203-0265 and they’ll be happy to work with you. Or call me at 404-294-9333 and I’ll answer any questions I can.

If you take advantage of this offer and register before Memorial Day and don’t need a payment plan you’ll receive a free advance copy of Tom’s latest book (to be released this summer) currently titled The Write Your Book in a Weekend Way of Life ($24.95 value).

Just didn’t want you to miss out on this deal because more than 1/3 of the seats under this special offer have already been claimed. Take action now and register!
Tom Bird

PS– We’re finalizing the venue now–you’ll be alerted as soon as details are available.

Here’s the link again:  Tom Bird

PPS– Maybe you want to use your book as your business card or to promote your expertise. Maybe your book is simply to leave a legacy for family and friends. Maybe it’s a lifelong dream that is bursting to come forth from your heart.

Whatever’s holding you back, let Tom help you LEAP over it with his stream-of-consciousness technique that banishes the Inner Critic. I KNOW this technique works because I experienced it in Scottsdale, AZ, in February and I’m now deep into the revision of my book.

HAVE YOU HUGGED YOUR SHADOW TODAY?

At one point along my path I was involved with a lovely man who did computer graphic design, had been in recovery from alcohol & drugs for ten years and was actively involved with Alcoholics Anonymous.

After one year with me he’d fallen off the wagon into alcohol relapse, partially because we weren’t on the same page & he was never the right person for me. But I did learn some valuable lessons in his presence.

On his mantel perched one of those cheap statues of a goofy-looking ghost with the slogan he’d put on it: “Have you hugged your shadow today?”

In other words, have you accepted even those dark & squirmy aspects of yourself and your behavior that you’d prefer to pretend don’t even exist?

The idea in AA is that if you CAN’T ACCEPT and even LOVE the shadow aspects of yourself, & can’t embrace your weaknesses in every way, that your recovery is doomed. Recovery simply can’t take the perfectionism (ego-mind) that wants to project your “wrongness” onto everybody else–thus making THEM the problem–the cause of everything that ails you.

Of course we know that WE are the co-creators of everything that comes up in our lives…. and if your life is not going well, that may be really hard to accept!

Here are some of the ways I allowed myself to hug my shadow in the past several weeks– a time of real grappling & self-reckoning:

1. I was challenged to state honestly what I really want out of any relationship with a man–and what kind of man I would want to be involved  with–which brought me face to face with how shallow,superficial and (yes) snobbish I can be regarding where I would choose to expend time & energy. Yes, I admit it: my ego confesses I am an education snob– though I know Steve Jobs was a college drop-out!

My Self–my Heart–knows that degrees don’t make the person, but yet superficiality and Ego are running their program here, and I have embraced that shallow aspect of me. It’s a challenge.

The Bible verse says, “Judge not, lest you be judged.” What that really means is that when you judge others, you’re judging yourself FAR MORE HARSHLY. Judgment is NOT conducive to a happy, healthy life. And yet, I hug my Inner Judge. I want to pinch her scrawny little cheek-and give her a big kiss! She knows who she is–and by God, she doesn’t care!

2. If we are co-creators of everything that happens, in order to learn, WHY did it take me so long to get the lesson of no longer lettingmyself be overpowered (physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally) by men?

Those who know me today might marvel at this notion, but reading those old journals has been like dredging the Mississippi River.

At age 13 my mother sent me to a child psychiatrist who helped me get the concept of “a healthy degree of self-assertiveness”–but as I look back, I see it took a LOT of self-examination, self-awareness, and then PRACTICE.

3. “I am my own movie.” A friend in a poetry-writing class in college penned this evocative line that I took to heart and used as a guiding light throughout some very tough years in my twenties.

As I witness the reels spinning along, I’m happy to say that by learning to embrace my shadow, I no longer need to create major drama in order to feel fully alive.
How’s your movie running lately? Have you hugged your shadow today?

A hearty round of applause to this junior Elvis
who really knows how to work a room!

http://www.wimp.com/dancingjive/

The Path does not need to be hard. It can be gentle.

God did not put us all here on earth to have hard, difficult lives, although we certainly have the option for a harder path if those are the lessons our soul has chosen for this lifetime.

Some people deliberately choose a harder path– a choice to live outside of the Flow, ignore it or struggle with it. If we choose that path through ignorance or ignoring the Truth, we can correct that.

But what if we choose it for other reasons: the glorious martyrdom. A sense of self-importance. The admiration from colleagues over one’s “intestinal fortitude.”

It all boils down to Ego. What if all that fortitude stored in the intestines yields a result like colon cancer–instead of the public acclaim for which so many people strive?

The secret is to not give a damn about the outcome or the way it will be perceived by others, but to do it (whatever it is–your creative outpouring) for your-own-self.

“For us there is only the trying. The rest is not our business,” said brilliant poet T.S. Eliot.

“You can’t please everyone, so please yourself,” we’ve heard from more than one source.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; Seek and you shall find; Knock and it shall be opened to you,” said our elder brother and Way-Shower, Jesus.

We don’t know what’s on the other side of that door, but unless we step up to it and knock, forget it. It’s up to each of us to step up to our door, which is just an illusion separating us from our inner resources, and knock.

Excerpted from my multi-award winning inspirational book,
BACK TO THE GARDEN: Getting from Shadow to Joy on Kindle

Download yours today!

A few years ago, within my own small circle of friends and family, three dealt with breast cancer; one had experienced two rounds of ovarian cancer surgery and three job losses within two years. Another had dealt with prostate cancer. My father and sister were in the process of divorces. And Fred had just “gone to Glory” after his two-and-a-half month knockdown fight with pancreatic cancer.

What about all the health challenges, the family changes and the job losses? What are they trying to tell us?

The earth is shifting so rapidly beneath our feet that it’s a matter of Adapt or Die. Use this as fertilizer or be buried in it, like the German elephant trainer who gave his constipated pachyderm an enema and literally suffocated in the result–this is the truth!

We simply must stay focused on our vision of what we want life to be, rather than getting mired in the muck of whatever negative may be happening around us. Regrettably, focusing on what we don’t want only draws it to us, especially if we attach a lot of fear or heavy emotion to our projection of the worst possible outcome.

Focusing on what we DO want is somewhat of a challenge when standing atop that mountain of manure. And of course that’s when a positive focus, and faith in positive outcomes, is the most absolutely necessary.

What if life were always peaches? We’d have no basis for comparison–no true awareness of how far we’ve brought ourselves. No sense of victory.

Every triumph seems hollow when it appears as a hand-off, especially if it hasn’t involved your own hard work with shovel, hoe and rake.

So get in there and start chopping the clods.

Excerpted from my multi-award winning inspirational book, BACK TO THE GARDEN: Getting from Shadow to Joy on Kindle or paperback.

While standing on top of the rock, amazed that I’d even made it, still huffing & puffing a bit–a yoga teacher who’s not accustomed to climbing rock faces at high altitudes
can be blown out of her comfort zone ;- } — I stretched my arms out to the sky and asked God, my Guides and the Universe to pour through me and assist me in penning forth whatever I’m supposed to write!

I did have a preconceived notion of what it’d be–something about my healing journey through breast cancer — but what came out during that stream-of-consciousness marathon turned out to be more about the healing journey of LIFE– 37,000 words worth! Painlessly and completely in the flow. A phenomenal experience & I highly recommend it to anyone who “has a book in them”–and that is about 85% of the public.  Tom Bird Seminars

(Remember, Jack Kerouac used this same technique in penning the classic best-seller ON THE ROAD–but I did it without drugs–well, except maybe a little ibuprofen after all the rock climbing).

SO many powerful healing tools exist–and I believe writing or expression through the heart center via art, song, music, dance, yoga, are among the best.

In the feature I’ll share an exercise with you that might help you get unstuck and open up to all the good that is pouring down around you! Ask and you shall receive!

A class member in my “Get the Life You Love” currently at Emory University’s Continuing Education remarked that she’d stowed her Vision Board in the back of her closet after we created them the week before.

This proved a bit of a conundrum to me, until I thought about how so many of us push away the world’s gifts, or even our own gifts to ourselves (such as allowing ourselves even to HAVE a vision of a life filled with freedom, happiness, a loving partner, more meaning, fulfillment and the joy of connection).

Then I remembered another friend who, when given gifts, would store them in his garage or basement and never even bother opening them.

That, I thought, is extremely odd. Why would anyone NOT want to receive a gift?

A few ideas came to mind:

*By receiving, perhaps he thought he’d be put in the position of owing something, or would be expected to render up something in exchange.

*Possibly the gift would be less perfect than one he could choose for himself, so he didn’t want to raise his expectations by opening it.

*He didn’t want to take the time. (I informed him that it’s an insult not to open gifts that people have given you, then to acknowledge them in some way).

*Perhaps he didn’t feel he deserved it. (I am not worthy!) -Careful what you tell the Universe about yourself– the Universe pays attention to our heartfelt beliefs.

*Possibly by receiving, he felt that he would lose control–whereas while giving, he stayed in control.

I think in my class member’s case it was more a question of DEFINITION–How does one DEFINE HAPPINESS?

So here’s the exercise, an ACTIVE IMAGINATION DIALOGUE with Happiness.

Active Imagination is a process where you get relaxed with some deep breathing, sit up straight at a writing table with both feet on the floor and your heart center open,
handwriting in your journal so as not to impede the flow. Write as fast as you can–don’t over think it– this is a right brained flow state of consciousness, tapping in to
your true essence. It is NOT analytical so please leave analysis/paralysis out of it. (Typing is a more left-brained activity, but if you really must, use your laptop).

Pose a question to My Happiness and respond as Me.

For example:

ME–Dear Happiness, what do you look like?

My Happiness: I look like such & such…

ME–Why are you so elusive?

MH–Because I…… and because you……

Etc.

Continue the dialogue for as long as necessary (you’ll know when you’ve resolved it–or not) until you can ask Your Happiness for a gift. Who knows what it will
look like or what insight it might bring?

The gift may unblock you to open up to your good.
Don’t you believe you deserve to be happy?

I know you deserve it.

I was personally challenged to stop medicating with relationships for a year by one former longtime boyfriend. He also happened to be my former therapist. Obviously
I’ve earned the right to expound on all these self-defeating behaviors because I’ve lived them myself!

It sounded like a death sentence. As we parted ways he told me, “You need to be celibate for a year; you need to learn to be on your own.”

I decided to meet the challenge. It was one of the most painful, and ultimately one of the most rewarding experiences I’ve ever had. I found that through taking
the path that didn’t seem so easy, I learned to be by myself; to quench my thirsty, lonely soul with the flowers in my garden or with the wet snuffle of
the neighbor’s dog in my face; to sing myself into solace as a mother would soothe her crying baby with gentle songs; to force myself to take my camera
and do shooting assignments for photography class by myself… to host special dinners on my porch and not feel as though I weren’t whole because I didn’t
have a date of my own.

All of these emotional stretches were opportunities for true inner strength to blossom…

Perhaps the biggest hurdle of all was spending numerous weekends alone in the mountains, where I owned a condo and knew no one. My solitary ventures
to Sapphire Valley, NC, and Bald Rock, the power spot at the pristine, silent mountain lake served me with salvation.

For seven years I’d bitched about my man and his many shortcomings, and finally I put the focus on me. Amazing how much less I had to bitch about!

And what an incredible blessing that was! I was so depressed I was barely able to put one foot in front of the other as I trudged around the glistening, sparkling, divinely deserted lake. But the solitude and the journey within healed me. From that long trek through the Void, creativity began tumbling out…

My heart was so broken… My own lyrics to the old Methodist hymn This is my Father’s World became my Balm of Gilead.

It was, and is, a love song to myself and to my valiant little heart, shattered as everyone’s heart is over and over in life…

The effects of this powerful little ditty on my heart were amazing. Eventually my heart began to pop out again, like a tiny chipmunk peering from its hidey-hole when the feline danger has slunk past. After having been stomped flat, truly crushed, it did begin plumping itself out and beating steadily once again. What a resilient muscle the heart is!

My heart filled with hope. Never give up.

MY LITTLE HEART SONG

“I love my little heart; I make room for it to grow…
When it peeps out, I want to shout, ‘My heart, I love you so!’
My little purple heart–it expands as it grows whole….
And all God’s love flowing from above fills up my hopeful soul.”

Happy Valentine’s Day

1. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: Cognitive refers to thoughts. For example, I think I may be going crazy. Contrast this with the idea, I’ve had thoughts about going crazy before and I’m still functioning.

Behavioral refers to how we act. Learning how to act in new ways produces new results.

2.Support Systems: Form a support system of encouraging and understanding persons. Sometimes this can come in the form of constructive confrontation–people gently letting me know how my behaviors adversely impacted others.

3. Medication: In a great film called Panic Prison, Dr. Jack Gorman talks about the irony of people who are afraid to take prescription medicine to allay anxiety symptoms, yet continue to use alcoholic beverages. Of all the anti-anxiety treatments, he notes, the one most likely to cause great harm in the long run is alcohol.

And there are more, including Education, Spirituality and Taking Risks.

If you have a loved one suffering from panic disorders, agoraphobia, or even Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder (OCD) –(Blaise said he made the sign of the cross so much while playing for his high school team that the coach asked him what was going on), this wonderful, heartfelt book may shed real sunshine into the black hole of self-doubt and help them reconnect with life.

Homebound No More

The suggestions below are from my mentor Jennifer McLean www.mcleanmasterworks.com and I appreciate the thorough instructions.

Over the years I’ve found that setting intentions is as powerful (if not more) for me than setting specific goals. When I intend to live on a higher level of BEING, goals in the third dimension come to fruition more easily. Here are the tips:

On a sheet of paper, write out all of the things from the current year that you’ve outgrown, no longer want in your life, no longer work for you, and anything else you feel you want to shed and leave behind.

On a separate piece of paper, write all of the things you can think of and feel that you want to grow and expand in the new year.

Then burn each paper in separate dishes or shells, making sure all pieces are turned to ashes.

Then, when cooled, put them into separate envelopes or containers (film canister, Ziploc baggie, etc.) and mark “to shed” and “to grow” on the container.

Around 5 minutes before midnight, start visualizing all the things on the “to shed” list, and see them slip away, see them blown away and washed away, out of your energy field, out of your life and out of your reality.

Then go outside and pour the “to shed” ashes into your hand and let the wind scatter the ashes away and release them and all they represent, as the old year fades away.

After midnight, after blessing the new year, with the second container “to grow”, visualize all of these goals, desires, etc. coming to fruition, to this level of reality.

I bring that envelope down to the garden, and with a stick dig a small hole, then plant these ashes in the earth, near a tree or in a special place, (for those in apartments, I encourage them to use their favorite houseplant).

The ashes are a reminder of the life cycle, the power of nature and the honoring of Mother Earth, that these seeds of hopes and dreams are nurtured into reality, in the coming year.

This ceremony was offered by one of Jennifer’s subscribers Maureen Collins, a wonderful artist and jeweler back in 2009. She has done this ever since with tremendous success and wanted to share it again with you all for 2012. You may want to try this and tweak it and do it a way that suits you.